I recently watched an interview with Martha Beck in which she was discussing her new book, “The Way of Integrity: Finding the path to your true self.”
If you have not heard of Martha Beck, she is an American life coach (most famous as being Oprah Winfrey’s coach), sociologist and author. In this book, she explains why “integrity” – being in harmony with ourselves–is the key to a meaningful and joyful life.
In one part of the interview, she mentions that, in many of her studies, when people are asked what they want, they reply with the typical…Nice House, Fancy Car, More time with the kids, Win the Lottery etc.
She then goes on to ask them…“In the quiet of the night, what do you yearn for?”
Over many years she has distilled this down to determine that all of us yearn for just four things – Peace, Freedom, Joy, and Love. (Take your time and let that sink in a bit… Peace, Freedom, Joy, and Love.)
It was with this revelation, I realised that, I too yearn for these and it is my constant work to reach these. For me Freedom is my number one driver. This has shown itself in my desire to have my own business from an early age and “be the boss” Not having to answer to higher management has meant that, while I may have worked equally as hard as my employees, I have had the freedom to choose what hours suit me and my family.
The Love component has been helped by knowing my Love Language and that of the people close to me.
If you have not read the book “The 5 Love Languages” by Dr Gary Chapman – do yourself a favour. The linked website has a quiz to do to determine your Love Languages.
The Joy and Peace factors are achieved in my life by being mindful of clutter around me. I do not cope with dis-order and find myself getting stressed and anxious around clutter.
I am not about to say that my life is perfect – far from it. But using this framework of striving for Peace, Freedom, Joy, and Love is a powerful method.
How do you create Peace, Freedom, Joy and Love in your life? Let me know in the comments.
PS. My “Rise to Rich” course can help you to create the Peace, Freedom, Joy and Love you yearn for by helping you to determine what those qualities look like in YOUR 10/10 ideal life. Find out more here..